POST-PARTUM BLUES : Too tired but NOT too weak.

We all have days when we’re tired. Too tired to even do anything. Especially when you have your little one by your side, needing your attention 24/7. You can’t even use the toilet in peace. At these times you need that ‘breather’ in your little comfortable space. You need to be able to drink your coffee while enjoying the weather outside. All these desires run in our minds… but you know you have responsibilities to take care of for the little-smiling cutie who is waiting for you.

We all want to overcome our challenges and strive to be stronger so that we can treasure each second of each minute, each day. Every night, telling ourselves, we can do this, we can survive the day – that is how every new mother gets through the next day, BUT this does not mean they are too weak, too tired however- Yes! Our mental strength can overpower all the fatigue and at the end of the day, that effort we put in is all worth the sacrifice!

Post-Natal Blues or as most call it, depression, is not an overnight feeling of stress which we can often just dismiss. It is a build-up of various factors which evolve around people who either make it better or worse. It is an inner struggle which mothers feel and fight in a battle of their own.

Then the questions come to mind:-

How exactly do we battle with it?
How do we negate the self–brought consequences?
How can we help others deal with post-natal depression?

1. Community support is important. We must be aware of our surroundings so that we can lend a helping hand to someone in need. Be vigilant and observe your friends and family members as they may not be open about their issues. More often than not they would be quiet, suffering in silence. Take the first step, speak to them and get them to open up about their problems.
2. “Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” ~ Leo Buscaglia
   Most mental issues’ basic cure is being listened to. We need someone to listen to us even if they do not have effective solutions. The power of listening is beyond that of what one can comprehend. Take out some time from our schedule and listen to someone in need.
3. If you are feeling lonely, reach out to other people. Isolation fuels depression. Talk your problems out. The simple act of talking to someone face-to-face about how you feel can be of enormous help. It will allow others to understand you. Instead of boxing up your emotions and issues, effective brainstorming can take place if you open up and let it out.
4. Start an exercise regime. Go for regular walks or engage in your favorite sports/ activities such as badminton or basketball. Physical activity during and after pregnancy improves mental health by relaxing your mind. Exercise acts just like an antidepressant. So wear your shoes and head out!
5. Create time for yourself. Get as much rest as you can. Being overwhelmed with household chores and babysitting will drain your energy. Take up your mother-in-law on her offer for free babysitting. Let your partner or another trusted adult take the baby for an hour or two. Engage in some relaxing activities that might help you e.g meeting friends, reading books, gardening, shopping, painting etc
6. Seeking help is important for one’s self growth. Seek and it shall be given. Post-partum mothers should seek help to be listened to and to find the social circle that they can relate to best so that their struggle is lessened and their joy is doubled. Joining a social group will widen their perspective of dealing with depression or post-natal anxiety.
7. Seek a therapist’s help or other professional help if you feel that you are unable to apply any of the suggestions offered above. A therapist will help you identify your ‘blind spots’ and will provide effective solutions to deal with the same. Through therapy, you can find better ways to cope with your feelings, solve problems, set realistic goals and respond to situations in a positive manner. In some cases, family or relationship therapy can also be helpful.

This post has been contributed by Ms. Radha Bai from : https://www.facebook.com/thenatalbluesstory/